Is my friend gay or what ? confused?

the only thing that makes a person gay is being sexually attracted to the same sex. all that other nonsense you mention has nothing to do with it, it just means he is girly which is in no way related to sexuality. you are both 13 and imo way too young to be thinking about this kind of stuff anyway, it's obvious you don't know much about it, so don't worry now and you will know for sure when the time comes.